What Game Do You Play?

I read a cross-cultural study one time that looked at the differences between Western and Eastern cultures and how they dealt with, not necessarily conflict, but how they handled a challenge they were presented with. The two groups were presented with a selection of two types of games (don’t recall what the games actually were). If a Westerner was not good at a particular game and asked if they wanted to participate in the same game the next time around, they would often decline and want to try their hand at the other game. However, if the same situation was true from the Easterner, they would in fact play the same game (that they were not so good at) time and time again.

This scenario speaks volumes to me. It shows me that Westerners are more inclined to be the best at something. If they’re not, they don’t want to face the challenge. They will move on until they find something they are good at with little to no effort, whereas the Easterners continually practice at something that they may only have a mediocre skill in at first.

This isn’t black and white stating all Westerners and Easterners are this particular way and I am in no way stating that one culture is better than the other. I just find it interesting that the majority of the culture I currently live in now want to “find something they are good at with little to no effort”. I’ve fallen into this many a time.

When the tides of opposition start lapping upon me, I either go into ostrich mode or run away altogether.

Up until recently, the thing I was most proud of was when I played my upper division my sophomore year at Lee. I never really practiced like I should have. I’m not sure if it was laziness on my part, or I would much rather be hanging out with friends than in the practice rooms tirelessly blowing through reeds, with a sore bottom lip as I practiced my clarinet. Whatever it was, I actually put in the effort for my upper division. I practiced like I had never practiced before. I cried. I was tired. I felt like I was never good enough. I was a music major and I STILL squeaked from time to time!!! But in the end – I never felt so accomplished….until recently.

I could have easily given up on my degree when I had to drop out of school the first time around. I could have said, you know what – I’m a working adult now and I’ll just work my way up in the company, but education has been instilled in me since the time I was a wee thing (probably doesn’t help that I’m the daughter of educators). There were many times I was miserable going to and from school because I hadn’t dealt with the hardships that I encountered in TN. Plus I was still dealing with PMDD, being weaned off medication, developing my new relationship with my husband, starting a home, working full time. It was not easy. But I kept at it.

There is something to be said about keeping at something - pushing forward when it seems all the odds are against you – continually striving towards a goal when others don’t support you. There will always be people out there that are better off OR worse off than us. There will always be people out there that are better OR worse at something than we are. We can only do what we are capable of, but I want to be more like my Eastern cousins who continually practice at something that they are not good at; who want to be better despite the odds against them.

Are you here to play the game even if you’re not good at it? Do you try again or do you turn to find something else that you can be good at with little effort?